


Five Unspoken Rules of Having an Ex (And How Christine Broke Those Too)

by TheHomestuckWhovian



Series: Christine Breaks All The Rules [2]
Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Gen, M/M, Platonic Relationships, Poor Jeremy, Post-Relationship, platonic Christine and Jeremy gives me life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-08
Updated: 2017-07-08
Packaged: 2018-11-29 12:38:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11441046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheHomestuckWhovian/pseuds/TheHomestuckWhovian
Summary: Christine and her continuing friendship with Jeremy after their break-up.





	Five Unspoken Rules of Having an Ex (And How Christine Broke Those Too)

**1) You avoid him and spend no time with him**

"I'm Christine. I have mad gigantic feelings about everything and have absolutely no flaws. People actually lift me in the air like a ballerina to sign up for the school play because I'm so short I can't reach the top. Do you want to hear my in depth analysis of The Twelfth Night?"

The group snickered as Jeremy posed in Christine's red jacket. His limbs were too long, as was his torso, but he was actually skinny enough to fit in it.

Christine grinned evilly as she pulled on Jeremy's blue cardigan. She slouched, shoved her hands in her pocket, and began.

"I'm Jeremy Heere and I got matching Pac-Man tattoos with Michael without our parents' permission sophomore year." She simulated a voice crack as she spoke. "I pretend to hate acting and swear that I only do it because my ex-girlfriend does it but I actually love it. I despise coffee but drink it anyway because I'm dead inside."

"Where's the lie though?" Chloe noted, snickering. She pulled off her jacket and tossed it to Jeremy, saying, "Do me next."

Jeremy slid off Christine's jacket before pulling on Chloe's and began. "I'm Chloe. I pretend not to give a shit about anyone but will legit murder you if you mess with any of my friends, especially Brooke. I lowkey am a total meme queen and send my friends jokes about how Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer all the time."

Jake tossed his jacket at Christine, who pulled it on. She straightened her back and swaggered forward, saying, "Hi, I'm Jake. I am the ultimate jock. I have participated in every sport from football to fucking archery. I make professional athletes look like they aren't dedicated enough. I also don't understand that 'break a leg' means good luck in theatre and got unreasonably mad when anybody said it to me."

"Me next!" Brooke called, tossing her yellow jacket to Jeremy. He put it on and posed, smiling.

"I'm Brooke. I love Pinkberry and once used my mother's car as a sexual metaphor. I pretend to be a terrible person but in actuality I'm one of the nicest people ever. I send people kitten pictures from my job at the animal shelter and have convinced half the school to adopt kittens because of this."

Michael looked at Christine, then slid off his hoodie and headphones. She beamed before putting them on.

"I am Michael Mell and I am literally the nicest person ever," Christine began after sliding the headphones around her neck. "I refuse to take credit for saving the school and give it to Jeremy because I am so nice. My confidence in my gayness makes everyone jealous and I was probably every boy's first gay crush. I also live off 7-11. Hey Jeremy! Let's get stoned in my basement!"

"I can confirm the gay crush thing," Rich remarked, grinning. Christine passed Michael's stuff back with a grin. Jenna tossed her jacket to Jeremy afterwards, and Jeremy took a deep breath before rambling quickly.

"I'm Jenna! I am the gossip queen and know more about what is going on at this school than anyone else! My bubbly personality and perceived openness is to disguise the fact that I can socially destroy you if you fuck with me or my friends. Did you hear about Dustin Kropp?"

Jenna nodded with approval as the others laughed, and Rich tossed his flannel to Christine.

She smirked as she put it on, sitting back down at the table and leaning on one arm, asking loudly, "So have you guys had sex yet?"

The table exploded with laughter, and Christine and Jeremy gave each other fistbumps, grinning wildly.

* * *

**2) You feel jealous when they have clearly fallen in love again**

"Yes! Finally!"

"Fuck yeah!"

Jeremy and Michael were dancing in delight, whooping and screeching in joy as they celebrated. Christine cheered, applauding their success at finally beating level 11 of Apocalypse of the Damned. She quickly pulled out her phone, saying, "Say victory!"

She snapped a photo of the two, Michael grinning so much it probably hurt and Jeremy looking at Michael fondly. She smirked at the photo, saying, "Perfect."

"I'm gonna grab some drinks," Michael said. "Then we'll start on level 12!"

"Alright!" Jeremy responded, smiling happily. Michael headed upstairs and Jeremy sighed, content.

"You've got it so bad," Christine remarked cheekily, causing her ex to blush. "I'll send you the photo I got then get it printed out for Michael. And I'm waiting for you to tell him."

"I can't."

"Why not?" she asked, genuinely curious.

Jeremy sighed. "The first thing he told me after he came out was that he was glad I didn't assume that he had a crush on me, because that was his big concern with coming out to me. He doesn't like me the way I like him."

"I think he was just concerned you'd be a dick about it," Christine remarked. "But it is your decision, and I'll respect it. Just don't let these feelings go Jonah on you, okay?"

"I'll try. And thanks for not pushing it."

* * *

**3) You let them deal with their problems alone**

Jeremy was laying on Christine's couch, looking exhausted in a way that wasn't stopped by sleeping. She sat next to his head, setting a bottle of Mountain Dew Code Red (which thankfully was just as effective and easier to procure) on the table in front of them.

"What did they say?" she asked gently.

He sighed, saying, "He called me terrible, said that I am a horrible friend and person and that one day you'd all realize it and drop me. Said that Michael would be disgusted with me if I ever admitted my feelings and that you probably hate me and pretend you don't because you are so nice. I look disgusting and I am disgusting. Everything about me makes me want to die. That I am wrong for not being completely interested in sex."

Christine winced, running a hand through his hair. "You know they are wrong Jeremy."

"I nearly destroyed the school, Christine. I...do you even care that the Squip did what they did to you because of me?"

Christine took a deep breath. "I care that my closest friend is laying on my couch unable to forgive himself for something he has been forgiven for. That he is refusing to free himself of this even temporarily because he thinks he deserves it. You don't deserve it Jeremy. No one deserves it."

Jeremy was silent, curling up tighter.

"Everything about you is so wonderful," she said. "Everything about you makes me glad to be alive. And I'm sure, if Michael were here, he'd tell you the same thing. So, can you forgive yourself enough to drink the soda?"

He was silent for a moment, before quietly saying, "I guess."

She smiled as she handed it to him, saying, "Remember. 'There are voices in my head, but...'"

Jeremy looked at her and gave a tiny smile, finishing, "The loudest one is mine." With that, he took a drink.

* * *

**4) You don't like anyone who falls for them**

"Hey Michael!"

Michael turned back to look at Christine, who was jogging up excitedly, and shifted his headphones from his ears. "What's up Christine?"

"I was wondering if you'd be interested in working on the lights and sounds for this coming up play?" she asked. "I know you don't feel comfortable on stage and you have a lot of cool ideas, so I thought you might enjoy it?"

Michael shrugged, saying, "I'm not really sure?"

Christine added, "Jeremy would probably be really excited? He'll be so surprised. 'Michael? You are participating too? That's awesome!' He'll probably smile a lot and you'll get to see him during rehearsal."

He blushed, grumbling in embarrassment before muttering, "Where's the sign up sheet?"

She grinned, holding it up. "After school Mr. Reyes will give you the keys to the control room for the lights and the speakers. There is also a spot light in there. I'm sure you'll have a lot of fun with it!"

"Are you secretly evil?" Michael muttered, smiling to show there were no hard feelings.

"Nope, just dedicated. See you at practice!"

She grinned excitedly as she walked away, already imagining how happy Jeremy would be to see Michael. Plus getting Michael involved would be so much fun!

She was already super excited.

* * *

**5) You don't want anyone else to be with them**

"I kissed him."

"You did?! Jeremy that's awesome!"

He shoved his burning face in his hands. "Then I ran away."

"...Less awesome, but hey! It's progress! Now you just need to apologize for running away and admit why you did it."

"I don't even know if I can face him at school tomorrow."

Christine sighed. "Jeremy, you can't just ignore this. Whether or not he returns your feelings, he is going to want an explanation, and you at least owe that to him. He has been your best friend for over twelve years. So you have to talk to him about this."

Jeremy looked at Christine, who gave him a pointed look, then took a shaky breath. "Okay. I'll talk to him. I'll tell him how I feel. I...I'm not sure I'll survive it but I'll do it." He groaned, muttering, "Why am I stupid?"

"There there Jeremy."

Tomorrow he'd talk to Michael, and admit everything. And Michael would probably tell him that he liked him back. And Christine couldn't be happier that her friends were finally going to get together.

**Author's Note:**

> I like this better than the first one.
> 
> Tumblr is boopboopitydoop.tumblr.com


End file.
